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Ash's true self....
http://forums.psypokes.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=21&t=24089
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Author:  lawa001 [ Sat Feb 28, 2009 5:21 pm ]
Post subject:  Ash's true self....

After Ash catches his first legendary, he goes power craze.

*At the PC

Ash: Yo, Oak, old man, take back this weakling rat!

Oak: Ash, you're so unrespectful! Where is Pikachu anyways?

Ash: Pikachu? Where's Pikachu? All you care about is that?

Oak: Well, yes

Ash: It's in this ball. hehe...

Oak: I'm transfering now.......Ash!? Where are you?

*Outside the PC

*Ash bumps into a shady character

Ash: Watch where you're going! Or I'll kick your aaaaa..a.a..a..(fades off) Arent you PKMN trainer RED?

Red: Yes, yes I am

Ash: I challenge you to a battle!

Red: Sure. I'll make this short.....

Ash: hehe.... *to himself *little does he know...I've caught all known legendaries.....

Ash: GO! Palkia!

Red: ...go....Darkrai...

Ash: What the hell is that? anyways, PALKIA, use Spacial Rend!

*Palkia misses*

Ash: PALKIA! You useless piece of junk! Return! Go Mewtwo!

Red: ...Darkrai...use...Dark Void....

*Mewtwo is asleep

Ash: MEWTWO! you f****** weak little piece of crap!

Red: Darkrai....use....nightmare....dream eater...torment........

*Mewtwo is undefinable pain.... GRRRAHH!

Red: RETURN! ....go....MAGIKARP! USE SPLASH!!

Author:  pokemonrox96 [ Sat Feb 28, 2009 5:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Ash's true self....

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Next...Magikarp KOs with splash!

Author:  comedianmasta [ Sat Feb 28, 2009 6:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Ash's true self....

*British Accent* Alright, well, I can't put it lightly. That was absolutley dreadful to the full extent of all mankind.

*Normal* Seriously, I don't think my eyes could take it, did you even try? This read like it was a joke piece, which no FanFic should ever readlike. You had... nothing... absolutley nothing to work with. And most of the content was completley disrespectful and unorthodox for this site.

Please, I don't mean to flame, but by all means don't write anything even close to this calliber ever again... for all time...

Author:  Crimson [ Sat Feb 28, 2009 11:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Ash's true self....

No. Just no. I second Comedian, don't post again unless you're going to put some effort into what you're writing and you follow PsyPoke's rules. That means no swearing.

Author:  Ghost Writer [ Sun Mar 01, 2009 10:47 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Ash's true self....

Well, after wasting my time reading about three lines, I've come up with three conclusions, all very likely.

1. You don't care (very likely)

2. You actually don't have an ability to write creatively, whether because you're just a kid, or you just happen to be terrible at anything involving the English language (less likely, but still a possibility)

3. You're a troller (in which case, I don't have time for you)

Author:  Galar [ Sun Mar 01, 2009 7:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Ash's true self....

I'm sincerely considering opening a Fanfics Applications thread. Seriously, if you people keep ignoring all the topics we have in this section that help you with your writing, I won't have another choice.

Unless you prove me the next and subsequent chapters are a thousand times better than this, your topic will remain locked. And most likely be used as an example of how not to write a fanfic.

If you are new to this and/or lack discernment of what is actually good and what is apparently fun, as in, you are very young and whatnot, then excuse us for all the harsh reviews. It's just that we're used to silly and real bad writers, unfortunately, and we can't really tell whether you wrote this unintentionally or not.

Locked.

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