Granted, but you only get to have it smashed in your face. You can't eat it.
I wish people would stop resurrecting games that have been dead for months. really, it's not that hard to look at the last post date.

Granted. They start resurrecting games that have been dead for years.
I wish for world peace.

peace, man. not piece.
Granted, but it can only be if you die. Will you make the sacrifice?? pleasemakethesacrifice, pleasemakethesacrifice.... lol
I wish i was less of a procrastinator.

Granted, but you start finishing things long before their deadlines and are overloaded with projects.

I wish that I didn't need to breathe.

Granted, but now you need to have a steady intake of water only achievable through IV (not individual values, intravenous) drip, meaning you can never be very active because you always have to take that pole with bags with you.
I wish.... for more interesting things in my life.

granted, now your being chased by serial killers every second. (pretty interesting if you ask me, but scary too)
I wish that i had a beard, so i could play with it.

Can i join the game?
Granted, it was 3 kilometres long that you have to pull it everywhere you go.

I wish that i was the smartest in my school.

(anybody can join; don't feel like backfiring right now)

Granted, but now you're considered the nerd and get thrown in a dumpster full of banana peals.

I wish I had more facial hair, just enough to make me look good.

Granted, but it's always covered in honey so that food gets stuck in it, bees never stop stinging your face, and bears maul you.
I wish for a penny. (What could possibly go wrong with a penny?)

Granted. Now you have nothing else. Be very thankful for your penny, Mr. Dude (next time wish for a half-dollar!! )
I wish I had wifi that was compatible with my DS (did i wish that already?? if so, then i wish for x-ray vision)

Granted, but you lost your DS.

Good idea. I wish for a half-dollar.

Granted, you have a half-cut of one dollar.

I wish my room was bigger.

Granted, but there's nothing in it.
I wish for a portable bed, so I can sleep in peace anywhere.

Granted, but it is too comfortable that you rest in peace on it.

I wish my life wasn't too depressing.

Granted.Now your life is so happy and cheerful,you don't know what to do anymore.

I wish the game Dark Void was longer.(Only 13 Levels?!)

Granted, but now it's so long that you die before you can get even half way through.

I wish my Kindle hadn't broken.

Granted, but then you lost it.
I wish I was stronger.

granted you are so strong when you take a step you launch yourself into space where you would have soffocated but your so strong your density kept some atmosphere with you, so *I gasp for air* you end up forever in space until aliens find you and use for their war(s). have a nice life.

I wish someone copied and pasted the words in red EXACTLY LIKE IT IS for their wish
I wish i got struck by lightning. I DON'T CARE IF I DIE I JUST WANT TO GET STRUCK BY LIGHTNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Granted, but it's not going to be me.
I wish my book report was done.

(then what're you doing here??)
granted, but it fails so miserably that you have to redo it, as well as write a fifty-page essay on why you should do things right the first time. MLA citations are a pain in the ass.
I wish using a computer for longer than an hour at a time didn't make my eyes feel weird *walks away from computer*

Granted, but it makes your neck, your arm, and your leg feel weird.

I wish i didn't have to go to school today.

Granted, but you are transported into the near future where you do have to go to school.
I wish things could happen.

???
granted, but only the bad things. like, wanting hot dogs and only finding hot dog buns in the fridge
i wish i had all the achievements unlocked in battlefront 2

Granted, but I scratched the disc so much, the game isn't playable anymore.
I wish, I wish, I wish for a fish.